Oh, Alaskan slip n' slide. You are the best entertainment I get all summer.
Your frigid Alaskan well water on warm summer days induce squeals of frosty surprise,
draw in shocked breaths,
prompt peals of surprised laughter,
and contort faces into shapes before unseen.
You make babies happy,
and cautious,
and snuggly,
and most importantly, tired.
Thank you.